It has been reported in the press that modern parents are spoiling their children. Grand-parents have been quoted as saying they are deeply concerned over how their grand-children are being brought up.

Many Grand-parents claim that when they became parents they were just left to their own  devices in bringing up their children and they feel that the parents of today are suffering from too much social pressure.

 Do we spoil our children and try too hard?Maybe we do, years ago as I was growing up, I remember enjoying baking with my grand-mother and even had fun helping my Grand-father in his vegetable allotment. Getting muddy and playing with worms and making mud pies are some of my fond childhood memories.

Do we now skip all the easy and simple pleasures of life and treat our children to an endless stream of activities that puts added stress upon us and our children. Managing to get to every activity on time with the correct clothing is not only a feat in itself but also expensive.

 Ballet, Karate, Swimming lessons, Spanish, Drama, Music and many others that cost us time and energy. Would we be better off financially and mentally if we picked our children up from school and took them home to enjoy an hour of gardening, baking, teaching them to knit or would we just be turning them into social outcasts?Is it time to get off the constant treadmill of their social activities and go back to the good old days?

Having two children is harder than having one, your work load is increased and your time will have to be divided between your children. 

It can be hard to cope with the different emotions you are bound to be feeling. Being protective over the new baby is normal and even feeling like you are not loving your first born enough is normal too. 

There will be big adjustments for everyone and this can take time so be patient and don’t worry about feeling like you haven’t got the love, time or energy to go around, eventually your new enlarged family will settle into normality. 

There are a few things to consider in helping your first born to accept the new baby. 

• Try as hard as you possibly can to keep up your normal routine, it may seem like hard work but your eldest child will cope better if they are still seeing their friends at playgroup, playing in the park with you and still having their bedtime story.

• Your eldest child (depending on their age) may go back to behaving like a baby themselves. They may want you to feed them, dig out their old dummy or cry for attention. Try not to get angry and this stage will soon pass.

• Get other family members to help you by looking after the new baby while you engage in a fun activity with your older child or simply enjoy a bath and cuddle together.

• To try and avoid jealousy from your older child by talking to them about how they were as a baby, get out old photos and ask your older child to help you look after the new baby. Let them feel involved by choosing their clothes or helping change a nappy or give a bottle.

• When the going gets tough remember it will get easier. If you really are struggling to fulfil the demands of both children ask a relation or friend if they could mind them for a while and take a much deserved rest.

Most of us look forward to the traditional Christmas dinner of turkey, roast potatoes and vegetables, with some of us making extra special effort of doing pigs on horse back, stuffing, cranberry sauce….the list is endless.  

Most children will find something they enjoy and even babies need meat and fish in their diet from around six months, so everyone can enjoy their Christmas roast. 

It can be a stressful time of year especially if you have children plus the added pressure of cooking for all the family. Remember that frozen vegetables often contains more nutrients than fresh as they are frozen within hours of being picked. So don’t try too hard by getting all fresh produce. Remember it is your Christmas too and you don’t want to spoil it by being tied to the kitchen. If you have lots of family coming over ask them all to bring something….it doesn’t mean you are not capable, it will just give you more time to socialise and spend some time with your children. 

Remember if you do have a baby and will be pureeing their dinner, use a baby food grinder for the potatoes as pureeing them in a blender breaks down the starch and will produce a sticky pulp! 

If you have slightly older children try to involve them, maybe they could help you make some Christmas biscuits or cakes. Use a basic recipe and buy some festive shape cutters, they will have fun cutting them out and when they are cooked they will love decorating them. There is some great tubes of coloured icing, get some sugar baubles and let their imagination go with chopped up fruit, the family will love them.

Years ago most of the children’s presents were hand-made but now in modern times we don’t seem to find the time to sit down and make things with our children. We’re much busier now, with plenty of working mums and dads working long hours. 

The thought of an afternoon spent armed with glitter, glue, scissors, coloured paper and an excited 4 year old might fill you with dread but what better way to enjoy some Christmas fun with your little one. It’s cheap and just how much mess can they make?! 

Grand-parents and relatives everywhere love something home-made and it’ll make a nice change and less expense than the obligatory socks, hankies and smellies! 

Handmade Christmas cards are great, especially if you can make the extra effort to get a photo of your little one dressed up in something festive. Once you have the photos, they can glue them onto some card, add the glitter and Christmas sprinkles and everyone receives a personal card which they can keep forever. 

Decorations for the Christmas tree are fun and something which you can keep year after year. Handmade bows, an Angel or Star for the top or even simple paper chains which they can colour, glue glitter onto or add Christmas pictures. Remember to keep all your old Christmas cards, they can cut out the pictures and use them next year for sticking and gluing.  

Name placements for the Christmas dinner can be fun. If you have the time you could find a funny picture of each relative to pop on them, if not let your children go to town with plenty of glitter and sparkles. The bonus of these is you get to decide where everyone will sit around the table! 

If you’re out and about get your children to look out for cones, leaves and twigs. This will keep them busy on their walk and back at home you can decorate them, paint them and use them as a Christmas collage or as a table centre piece!  

Good luck and Merry Christmas!